Muggle Yoga
by curraheesledgehammernuwanda
Summary: Draco Malfoy is an Auror in the Ministry but after several accidents in their department, the Minister has created a required yoga class for all current and incoming Aurors in order for them to complete their training. I wonder who the teacher is...?


Muggle Yoga

Disclaimer: I have no idea what this is. But I still don't own Harry Potter

Draco Malfoy was having a rather sour day. It was the third time this week the Auror Department let several Death Eaters slip through their fingers.

Of course, it hadn't been _his_ fault, he mused. It was all Weasley's doing.

"Clumsy oaf," Malfoy muttered under his breath.

If the Weasel hadn't stepped so loud over that damn twig, the Death Eaters wouldn't have become alarmed…

There was a group of Ministry workers clustered around a moving billboard down the hall. Draco frowned and moved closer. He was the Head Auror, after all, next to Potter.

"What's going on?" he asked a short raven-haired woman.

She batted her long eyelashes at him and simpered.

"Well?" he spat impatiently, jamming his right hand deep into his trouser pocket.

"You're not going to like this, Auror Malfoy," she cooed, damn near breathing in his ear.

He gritted his teeth and sneered.

"Get off me," he pushed himself away from her, shoving people out of the way to get closer to the sign.

Draco squinted his eyes for a moment before dropping his jaw and bugging his eyes out. In an enraged state of shock, he read the sign aloud:

"Due to the frequency of accidents and mishaps within the Auror Department as of late, the Minister of Magic himself has declared a mandatory course for all current and incoming Aurors on stealth and balance through the use of Muggle Yoga-"

Draco rolled his eyes at this. Sure, he had switched sides during the wat and became a spy for the Order but that didn't mean he was going to start dabbling in the Muggle lifestyle and promote inner breeding.

"Incompetence in the Ministry, as usual," he muttered, skimming over the rest of the sign:

"All Aurors current and incoming will be starting this course on Monday the 24th of January with Instructor-"

"GRANGER!" he bellowed.

"Calm down, Malfoy. It's not the end of the world! You know Hermione, she's nice and will be very gentle in class-"

"Easy for you to say, Potter. You weren't the one that got punched by her iron fist in third year!"

"Alright, so she doesn't like you but-"

"Doesn't like me?! DOESN'T LIKE ME?! SHE THINKS I'M WORSE THAN VOLDEMORT WAS! Ever since I joined the Order and straightened myself out, she's liked me less and less. She thinks I'm evil."

Harry scowled.

"She does not! She just doesn't trust you. And, honestly, who can blame her? You are a Slytherin."

"Oh, so that automatically makes me the bad guy?"

"No, but-"

"Merlin was a Slytherin, believed to be trained by Salazar himself, and he was one of the most powerful wizards of all time. And he was good so why does-"

Draco's voice was cut off by the sound of the door banging open, revealing Ron standing there rather embarrassed and flustered.

"This is all your fault, Weasel!" Draco bellowed.

Harry groaned and slumped into a chair, getting the beginnings of a headache.

"My fault?!" he said angrily, "how is this my fault?!"

"if you hadn't stepped on that damn twig-"

"You were the one that knocked Harry against a tree-"

They were interrupted by a group of Aurors walking in and waving at them in greeting. Draco bit his tongue and refrained from saying anything menacing to Ron.

The three men remained silent, sourly glancing at one another while crossing their arms over their chests.

The door opened once more and in came Hermione, smiling cheerfully and waving at Ron and Harry. She ignored Draco's haughty gaze sweeping over her figure.

That can't really be Granger, can it? Draco thought. Since when did she look so…nice?

He shook his head and tried to clear his thoughts back to the present.

She clapped her hands to get everyone's attention as the last wisp of chatter died down.

"I am so glad all of you are here today. As you know, this is a new required course added to your education and career as an Auror. If you'll all follow me down the hall we will enter our classroom. I have it all set up so please do not touch anything just yet."

Begrudgingly, Draco sulked down the hall with the rest of the Aurors, Ron and Harry trailing behind them, muttering to each other.

"I'm going to show her how muscular I am when we do this. I'll carry you, Harry, on top of my back while we run laps and stuff."

Draco rolled his eyes and snorted.

"Oh, please, Weasley," he muttered irritably, "you can't even carry yourself while walking, you clumsy git. And besides, you don't do that kind of thing in yoga."

"How would you know?" Ron glowered at him.

Draco smirked and tipped his nose up, sniffing in the air pompously.

"Because in yoga, one stretches their body and holds the position in order to become more flexible and gain better balance. One has to have lean muscle and one has to be able to hold the pose gracefully over a long period of time…rather like a snake."

He smiled to himself, growing prideful over his former house mascot.

"Oh, shut up, will you?" Harry hissed under his breath.

They filed into the room one by one and stood in rows; all eyes were fixed on Hermione.

"Now, whether you are Muggleborn or not, this is a very different kind of exercise if you have never tried it before, so to start things off, I'll have us begin with the most basic stretches and poses yoga has to offer. Let's begin in the Mountain Pose…"

Oh, please, this is ridiculous, Draco thought. What am I doing here? _I'm_ not the stupid Klutz.

"Mr. Malfoy, we are on the stork pose now. Please do try and keep up." She sniffed before turning away.

Ron stifled a chuckle under his breath while Draco glowered and mentally calling Hermione obnoxious names.

Bushy haired Granger, always trying to see the mistakes in other people when she can't even see the wrongs she's done. Oh, look at me, I've read _Hogwarts: A History_ fifty billion times, what's your magical power?

Draco rolled his eyes in disgust as they lowered onto their mats to do the cat pose.

As he glanced at Hermione to see how the pose was done, he couldn't help but notice how her bottom and back arched gracefully and swayed in the air for a moment before rounding her back and tucking her head between her collar bone.

He silently grunted, sweating from the difficulty of keeping the pose, and punished himself for thinking such thoughts about Granger and began once more to degrade her.

And those abhorrent teeth, still crooked after all these years, as if she couldn't fix them with magic. Does she want to keep looking ugly as always? Godric knows she is well aware of a spell that would fix it. She is after all the walking spell book encyclopedia…

"Mr. Malfoy, we are on downward facing dog. Your mind is utterly cluttered today. That is one of the worst things to have during yoga."

He grimaced and muttered obscenities under his breath.

Well, it's your fault, Granger, not mine. I was trying to do this stupid class but then you showed up and had to lift up your perky bum towards my face…

Damn her!

OW!

A searing shot of pain spread throughout his legs as he tried to mimic the rest of the class and staggered back towards his mat. Harry glanced at him and rose his eyebrows.

Draco sneered in return and managed to pull himself back up, ignoring the burning crawling up and down his muscles.

When they sat back down to stretch out their legs, his face was flushed and his hair was plastered to his forehead.

He glanced up at Granger and mentally threw darts at her.

Why did I even become an Auror? I could have been perfectly happy as a Healer. I love Potions and working meticulously with other people who are at least tolerable.

He hadn't noticed Hermione getting up from her spot and strolling around the room to see the progress of her students until she was three people away.

Oh, shit.

Draco broke out in a cold sweat and feebly tried to grab ahold of his ankles to at least look like he was semi-flexible but all it did was made him want to howl in pain.

When Hermione got over to him, she stared at him for a moment, contemplating what he was doing, then pressed his back forward, noticing the sticky sweat against his shirt and the tension there.

"Goddamn it, Granger!" he muttered, teeth clenched and eyes screwed up tight.

She couldn't help but smile at his helplessness and bent down to his level.

"See me after class."

Unfortunately, that came much sooner than Draco had anticipated.

He lingered nervously, fiddling with the loose strings on his trousers and shirt cuffs before finally walking up to her and waiting for what seemed like his death sentence.

She didn't turn around as she spoke but he knew she knew he was right behind her.

"You were struggling in my class."

"Yeah, so what?"

"That's a problem."

"Look, Granger, I don't want to hear any more of your philosophies about why you don't like me. I already know why."

"This has nothing to do with that!"

"Prove it! All you do is criticize innocent people who-"

"You call yourself innocent?" she laughed loudly, "that's the saddest joke I've heard in years."

"I don't know what your game is, Granger, but I don't think I need any more embarrassment from you when I have to parade this around on my arm for the rest of my life!"

He jerked his shirt sleeve up violently, revealing a pale Dark Mark that had remained dormant for years. There were scars on it, burn marks, signs that he wanted it gone forever. But it stayed, like so many memories he had he rather wished he didn't possess. She stared at it for a long moment before drawing her eyes up to his and without blinking, slowly pulled his sleeve back down his arm to cover it again. Draco felt the tips of her fingers brush against the light, downy hairs of his forearms and the skin of his wrist before she whipped her hand away.

"If I don't pass you, you could lose your job."

Draco dropped his jaw in shock.

"This must be some kind of sick joke!"

"No, it isn't. The Minister of Magic himself gave me the authority to revoke any licenses of Aurorship if someone does not pass my class."

He rolled his eyes and scoffed in disgust.

"Then you might as well take it away from me now. They could always use me in the Potions Department…"

"Malfoy, I'm not giving up on you!" she cried violently.

Draco widened his eyes in bewilderment.

Since when did Granger care about him?

"Why waste the opportunity of showcasing me as the biggest screw up in Auror history. 'Ex-Death Eater, Now Ex-Auror Because of Failed Muggle Yoga Course'. Oh yeah, it would be the talk of the town, Granger. You should take your chance while you can." He spat savagely, turning away from her.

"You think I'm a monster, don't you, Malfoy?" she asked quietly.

"That's what you think of me."

"It is not!"

"Then what do you think of me?" he snarled.

She looked up at him for a moment before dropping her head.

"I think you're different."

He rose an eyebrow and turned to face her once more.

Why were her caramel eyes so shiny all of a sudden?

"Different?"

"Yes, different."

She blinked at him before gulping and wetting her lips.

Draco traced the line of her tongue with his eyes.

"Now, do you want my help or not?" she snapped back to her old self, taking several steps away from him.

He considered her proposition and he odd behavior all at once. It was as if they were being…civil.

"I-I suppose. But what would I have to do?"

"Well, you'd have to Apparate to my apartment-"

"No way, Granger! There is no way I am setting a toe inside anything your apartment! I can imagine the mess already. Probably filled with old books and musty smelling parchment-"

"Fine! I'll Apparate to yours then!"

They both sneered at each other, lips curled savagely and eyes staining each other's faces from the intense stares.

"Hey, Hermione, are you-oh."

Both of them whipped their heads to the door to find Harry peeking in with a curious expression on his face.

Why hadn't Draco realized that they were practically nose to nose?

He shuffled back and headed for the hallway.

"At 8 on Tuesday! Don't forget, Malfoy!"

Draco sighed, exasperated by the whole ordeal with Granger and wondered why his wrist still tingled from her light touch.

And so the nightmare began.

Tuesday night came faster than Malfoy had expected. He had just been dining with fellow millionaire bachelor Blaise Zabini when an owl soared through an open window of the restaurant, landing right on the edge of Draco's plate. As the owl stuck its leg out towards him, it chomped its beak and hooted at his food. Taking the letter, he grunted and shoved a breadstick underneath its claws. He avoided the gaze of his friend and others in the restaurant as he opened the message and began to read:

"Malfoy,

I expect you have put this out of your mind since the last time we met but tonight is when your first private lesson is to take place. Now, before we meet, I advise you to change your attire as I know you filthy rich snobs wear satin and cashmere to just about everything, I suggest you wear loose clothing that you feel comfortable in and that you don't mind sweating in. In addition, do not wear your robes. I don't want to see your repulsive hairy legs even if you do wear silk boxers with diamond buttons that keep your fly shut."

"I do not wear diamond studded boxers!" Draco bellowed at the piece of paper.

Zabini cleared his throat and Draco looked up to see the whole restaurant gawking at him.

Malfoy flushed as he said, "Well, it's true!" and glanced back down to continue reading the letter.

"Remember at 8 tonight. And do clean up your apartment as I've heard abhorrent rumors from several witches about the state of your bedroom. Crumpled sheets and mess beyond imagination. Until tonight.

Your savior,

Hermione J. Granger"

Draco guffawed and ripped the letter into shreds.

"You're just jealous that you can't get into my bedroom, Granger! Those sheets only get crumpled after a good-"

People were staring at him again with queer and almost fearful expressions. He turned paper into ash and stomped off, leaving a very confused Zabini and his plate of pasta, which still emitted transparent steam.

Draco paced his grand room in an irritated manner, glancing at the clock every few seconds. Rolling his eyes, he plopped himself onto the couch and brooded. Granger was late. He sneered, gripped his wand while muttering, "Accio pipe."

It whizzed through the air and landed in his palm. Lighting it manually with a match, he stuck it in his mouth and puffed out a cloud of smoke. He was wearing silk lounge pants and a matching jacket.

Suddenly, a whirl of color and bushy hair appeared in front of him, causing him to lose track of his thoughts. When the movement stopped, Hermione stumbled forward and brushed back her hair.

Draco stood up and wedged a hand onto his hip.

"And why the hell are you late?"

His tone was venomous.

"I'm so sorry, Malfoy. I never realized you cared so much about my well-being."

He rolled his eyes and blew more smoke out of his pipe. Hermione's gaze faltered.

Since when did Malfoy smoke a pipe? And since when did he look so good while doing it?

And his clothes… her eyes drifted over his lithely clothed body and she caught her breath. He was made beautifully. Tall in stature, pale skin slightly flushed, aristocratic nose and high cheekbones which gave him a rather regal air. His eyes were murky with forbidden hopes and undreamt dreams; grey and navy and silver swirled all together. His eyelashes thick and long arched flawlessly. And his hair was as blonde as ever. It was slightly disoriented, messy and tainted by the marks of his fingers sliding through the golden locks-

Oh, Hermione, stop it! This is Malfoy you're looking at!

She shook her head and flared her nostrils.

"Well? Are you ready?"

He squinted his eyes at her. She squinted back. Several moments passed and realizing he was in defeat, Draco sighed and nodded his head unwillingly.

"Okay."

With a flick of her wand, a blue mat sprang to the floor.

"Sit down on it."

For once, Draco complied without fussing.

"Stretch out your legs."

He did so and winced, recalling the aches and pains that had been plaguing him.

"Does that hurt?"

He scoffed and muttered, "Of course not."

"Liar."

She bent down onto her knees and pressed on his knees to straighten his legs out.

"Bloody hell, Granger! What are you trying to do to me?" he wheezed, recoiling from her touch.

"Lie back."

Draco gawked.

"What?"

"You heard me. Lie back."

"Don't be ridiculous, Gran-"

"Do you want to continue to be an Auror or not?"

With much grumbling, Draco finally did Hermione's bidding and laid back on the mat.

She stood over him with a quizzical expression on her face.

"What are you looking at?" he snarled.

"It's just all so…odd."

"What do you mean odd?"

"You. Your…situation. I can't…I don't understand."

"Yeah, well, there are a lot of things I don't understand. Like how Potter became the Chosen One."

"Oh, stop it. You're just jealous."

"I am not!" he shrieked, crossing his arms over his chest.

Hermione lifted his legs up by the ankles and straightened them in midair.

"Well?" he croaked. "What the bloody hell is the problem?"

Hermione mumbled inaudibly, bending his legs in various positions before answering.

"You're stressed, Malfoy. And nervous. And afraid."

She gently put his legs down, patting his knee and walking over to her notebook to write something down.

"I'm sorry. What?"

Draco's brow furrowed.

"You're stressed out."

He scoffed. "Granger, please I am not 'stressed out', I-"

"Yes, you are. And who could blame you after Voldemort and that Death Eater stint?"

He gritted his teeth.

"That wasn't a stint. It was a mistake."

They stared hard at one another before breaking eye contact.

"Well, either way, it put a lot of stress on you, Mal-Draco. And the only way to every remedy this is if you relax."

"I am relaxed!" he snapped.

She smiled softly and shook her head.

"No, no, you're not. Ever since I apparated in here, I've sensed an air of tension and frustration."

"Frustration?! It's not my fault that I'm forced to actually spend time with you! How did you think I was going to react? With a nice invitation to tea and scones?"

She sighed and sat down next to him, settling her gaze on his strong cheekbones.

Draco squinted at her.

"What are you-"

"Stop clenching your jaw."

"I'm not!"

"Yes, you are. Open your mouth."

He parted his lips, wetting the his lower one with the tip of his very pink tongue. Hermione felt a pleasant jerk in the pit of her stomach. Oh, what would it be like if his tongue ran across her bottom lip, down her throat, over her pert and hardening nipples-

What was she thinking? This was Malfoy she was fantasizing about. _The_ Draco Malfoy.

She exhaled a shaky breath before speaking again.

"Now, close your mouth but keep your teeth apart. And imagine…imagine you're somewhere peaceful, where no one can hurt you and you're happy…"

Granger's voice floated through Draco's head and clouded his thoughts. He was thinking of somewhere peaceful all right…. Somewhere like Granger's bed!

His eyes flew open and gasped. How could he betray his own mind like that?

The Gryffindor Princess, the bushy haired know-it-all was _not_ attractive and certainly not to Draco Malfoy. He mentally scoffed at the thought. He must have accidentally let his guard down… he needed to freshen up on his Occlumency skills. Hopefully, Granger didn't know how to perform Legilimency.

"What are you thinking about?"

"How unattractive you are. Merlin's beard, Granger, I never thought you could get worse looking than in school but it seems I stand corrected."

She slapped him.

"Do you want to lose your job, you slimy git?"

"No, but I don't want you to slap me again, either!"

"Then shut up and listen."

They did several exercises aimed to maximize tranquility and thoughts of peace. After what seemed like forever, Hermione brought him out of a sleep-like phase and told him to sit up next to her.

"How do you feel?"

"Like a bloody king."

She glared at him.

"Alright, alright. I'm fine."

"Good. Now look at me."

"No, I think I'd rather barf instead."

She slapped him again.

"Okay, okay!"

He turned his face towards hers, his eyes still lulled from sleep.

"For every word I say, I want you to tell me the first thing you think of. And don't lie to me. I know when you do."

She looked into his eyes for a moment and Draco thought he felt a slow burning movement making its way towards his trousers but then she looked away and it was gone.

"Voldemort."

"Death."

"Hogwarts."

"Professor Snape."

"Harry Potter."

"Git."

Hermione rolled her eyes at this but continued.

"Black."

"Dementors."

"Chocolate."

"Remus Lupin."

"Fear."

"Me."

"Red."

"Fred Weasley."

She paused for a moment and looked into his face. With his eyes closed, he seemed almost innocent.

Finding herself staring at the angles of his jaw, she blushed and went on.

"Sock."

"Dobby."

"Fruit."

"Green apple."

"Boggart."

"My father."

"Love."

Here Draco stopped and clamped his mouth shut, screwing his eyes closed before opening them and looking down.

"There's no such thing."

"What do you mean?"

"There's no such thing. It doesn't exist." His face was masked with disgust.

"Of course it does, Draco. That's why people get married and have children and-"

Hermione hesitated and her words faltered.

"That's why they what?" his eyebrows rose up, a horrible sneer rising on his pale lips; for the first time Hermione was afraid in front of him. "That's why people are nice to each other? That's why they care for one another? That's why you're doing this for me, Granger? You love the human race and you wish to take pity on me? I don't need your sympathy, Granger. And I don't need you. So just- just get out!" he shouted in her face, getting up from the floor and tugging her towards the door, forgetting that she had apparated.

"Get off me, Malfoy! You have no right to-"

"I have every right! This is my fucking house!"

"I want to help you-"

"You just want to make fun of my failure and then go tell Potter and Weasley about it!"

"That's not true, Draco!"

"Oh, back to first name basis, are we?" he shrieked, digging his nails into her forearm.

"Draco, you're hurting me!"

"I don't care, goddamn it! I don't care!"

"Why do you have to be so mean?!" she cried, tears forming puddles on the rims of her eyes.

He yanked her arm away, cheeks singed with blush and eyes flashing with ice.

"Because I haven't been taught anything else!" he yelled, chest heaving in anger, "because I haven't been taught anything else."

Hermione kept silent, mouth open and gaze wide, shocked that he would admit his own faults, shocked that he knew he had any faults.

"You want the truth, Granger? The real thing?" he laughed cruelly at the sound of his own gravelly voice. "The truth is all those years I taunted you back at school, all those times I called you a Mudblood and a bushy haired know-it-all was because I liked you. I thought you were brilliant and charming and brave. And I kept that thought in my mind for years, only nurturing it in the pitch dark of night because I was afraid someone would find out. And then of course Voldemort came back and I had a job to do. But I couldn't focus on it, not really. Because all I could think about was how were you going to stay safe, being a Muggleborn and being one of Potter's best friends? I tormented myself night after night thinking about you and where you were and what you were doing. Then I woke up one day and couldn't take it anymore. I fled the Manor and joined the Order. I didn't come to your side because of Potter, he's a stupid git. Always have thought that and always will. I joined the Order because of you, Granger."

They stared at one another, both of them astonished at what he had just said.

Draco cleared his throat and looked away, fiddling with a loose string hanging from his pants.

"Draco, do you… do you really mean all that stuff?"

He hesitated for a moment, pondering whether he should say no just to toy with her emotions. But it wouldn't be fair to either of them. She deserved the truth and he would give it to her.

"Every word."

Hermione blushed and looked away, her eyes misting over with gladness.

Draco stepped in between her feet, took her in his arms, and pressed his forehead against hers, rubbing his nose against the softness of her skin. He heard her intake of breath and felt her shudder beneath his fingertips.

"Draco, when I told you that you were a foul, loathsome, evil, little cockroach…"

He chuckled and turned her face up to meet his.

"You didn't mean it?"

Eyes shining and mouth curved up into a smile, she shook her head and giggled.

"No, I meant every word."

And she leaned forward, sealing his lips with hers.


End file.
